I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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