I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
