who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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