If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
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