did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
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