so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
