But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
