you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
