I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize