It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
