I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
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