So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
