I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Randomize