I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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