Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
