so explain again why im purple
no
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
