I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
why do cheetos always look like penises
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
