If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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