I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
