she woke up with a sticky ear
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
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