the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Randomize
