If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
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