do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
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