Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Randomize
