Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
