She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
