So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
