ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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