and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
