I think I am morally bankrupt
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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