I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
