she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
