Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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