I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i just had sex bonerless
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
