hotel room ftw
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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