Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
