Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Randomize
