there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
