We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
