Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
