He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
