Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
