What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize