hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
We smell like vodka and hangover
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