She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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