I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
