Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I need moral support for this bender
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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