Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize