You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
