The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize